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Tuesday, July 08, 2014

This video has amassed nearly 2 million views on YouTube since being posted on Saturday.

‘I’ll grab your dick!’: Florida women lash out after botched theft is caught on video

Police in New Smyrna Beach, Florida, will not pursue a case against two unidentified women who have gained attention online after getting caught trying to steal somebody else’s beach canopy,WTVT-TV reported.
The two women could have faced charges of grand theft and simple battery, authorities said, but the canopy’s owner — who filmed their reaction as he caught them red-handed — declined to press charges, saying their bout with infamy was punishment enough. The video has amassed nearly 2 million views on YouTube since being posted on Saturday.
The canopy owner, who identified himself as Rich in a statement to Gawker, said that he originally thought the two women were trying to help his family set the canopy up.
“I was surprised when they said it was theirs and stuck with the story,” Rich stated. “They were grasping for straws by saying my oldest son’s beach toy belonged to them. I offered to let them move along but the one woman ‘was not making it slide.’”
After telling the women the canopy, the toy and a set of chairs nearby belonged to his family, the footage shows one of them telling Rich to “put the go*damn camera down.”
“No, step away from my sh*t,” he responds. “How about that?”
“You know what? I will,” the woman answers. “And then I’m gonna take that camera and put it in the grass. Are you gonna like that?”
The woman then advances toward Rich, who can be heard saying, “Seriously?” before the footage stops. But he told Gawker that the confrontation continued.
“What followed was pure gold,” his statement read. “I continued to back up as we went around the canopy frame. In the most bizarre moment she gnashed her teeth, lunging at me with an open palm and said, ‘I’ll grab your d*ck!’ I appreciated the offer but didn’t feel the chemistry was there.”
He said that the women then said they needed to call someone named “Pat,” but refused to use his “tainted” phone, before leaving the scene.
Watch footage of the confrontation, as posted online on Saturday, below.

Arturo R. GarcĂ­a who wrote the above post is the managing editor at He is based in San Diego, California and has written for both print and broadcast media, including contributions to, The Root and Comment Is Free. Follow him on Twitter at @ABoyNamedArt
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